My son turned six-months-old last week, which also meant I reached a personal milestone for myself. Six months of exclusively breastfeeding Jackson. My initial goal was to simply breastfeed, even if it only worked for three days. Once I passed that goal, I set a new one of six weeks, then three months and six months.
When I began my breastfeeding journey, I had no idea what to expect. I heard horror stories and was fully prepared to not be disappointed if it didn’t work out for my baby and me. Fortunately it did and Jackson latched on in the hospital when I got to see him, two hours after my emergency cesarean-section. I was extremely lucky and never experienced any type of soreness or bleeding, but we have had our challenges. I developed some mild postpartum anxiety, particularly involving breastfeeding.
Jackson was always little, born at six pounds- two ounces and was never a “big eater.” Many of my friends all had big, chunky babies who loved to eat (whether it was formula or breast milk) and Jackson always seemed to look like he was on a diet when he was around them. This fueled my insecurity about our breastfeeding relationship. I was always worried about whether or not he was getting enough milk, was I nursing enough, is he gaining weight?
He has gained weight, albeit slowly. My OB/GYN and Jackson’s pediatrician both reassured me that my breast milk was feeding him just fine and try not to worry. The anxiety eventually lessened over time, but I still talk about breastfeeding with my Mom friends; often just to make sure what I’m doing is normal and is best for my son.
The challenging thing about breastfeeding is that just as I’m getting used to doing it one way, he hits a developmental milestone and changes things around. For a while I had to nurse him laying down in the dark, then I had to exclusively pump and feed him a bottle (while he laid on his side) and most recently we are working on breastfeeding while introducing solid foods.
Our pediatrician recommended introducing some cereal and fruit at four months. I know this is a controversial topic, but I felt comfortable offering it to him at four-months-old. He wasn’t ready. I tried to give him rice cereal twice and his stomach got upset and he didn’t enjoy the “solid food experience.” I put the cereal box in the pantry and tried again at five months. He was ready and it has been fun trying different fruits, veggies and cereals.
This new addition to Jackson’s diet has also thrown a curveball into our nursing relationship and has introduced some new worries for me. Is he getting enough breast milk? Is he getting enough iron? Every day I have to take a step back, take a deep breath and remind myself that I’m doing the best I can and he is a healthy, happy little boy.
I often turn to my Mom friends at Twitter to get reassurance about breastfeeding. I’m the first in my family to breastfeed, so I can’t ask my Mom or Grandma about their breastfeeding experience. Having a strong network of Moms has been one of the main reasons I have accomplished my goal of breastfeeding for six months. Without them, I wouldn’t have made it past a couple weeks. I know I’ll be turning to them for support in the next six months as I reach for my goal of breastfeeding Jackson for a year.
You can do it!!! My little guy is a year now (we're weaning, sort of) and he has been breastfed all the way til now. He HATED solid foods at four months, but started eating them more as he got older. I was at the grocery store tonight & I realized that he had only nursed one time today & I got so sad! lol I'm not ready for it all to end! That's awesome that you've made it to six months! I'll be cheering you on for the next 6!
Thank you Kate!
Congratulations on meeting your milestone! I am still breastfeeding baby #3 who is 16 months old – you can do it! I think the first 3 months is the hardest and once you are able to confidently make i there – you will do great! Continue to have confidence in yourself, your body and your breastfeeding relationship and you will definitely make it to 1yr + ?
Thanks! I agree about the first 3 months being the hardest… thanks for reminding me about having the confidence– I think that's the most important part 🙂
I was going to text you and ask you what you were doing about breastfeeding now, since I knew your next reeval was 6 months 🙂 You are a great mom! I can understand why you'd be anxious. I would too. but you're right, he's healthy and happy and you're so attentive I think you'd def know if something was wrong and needed to be done. ;);)
congrats, mama! it is definitely a challenge at first and not something that we just automatically do without any concerns or questions. my first daughter, who i BF'ed for a year, was also "small" at birth- only 5 lbs, 11 oz (she had a cord issue- wrapped around her neck 3 times tightly so we think it affected her weight right at the end.. but she is 100% fine today) and all i ever got was, "she's SO tiny," where ever i went and i also questioned whether or not she was getting enough from my BF'ing. but then i just stuck to my schedule and she caught up and gained weight and seemed very full and happy after feedings, so i put my worries aside and just went with it. my thought was that it was so good for her that i was doing the right thing and i was feeding her what seemed like a million times a day, so she HAD to be getting enough. but i still worried. so i know how you feel about that. and about how next to other babies, feeling like he/she is the one on weight watchers. she may have been small as an infant for many months, but now she's in the 90th for her height and weighs 30 lbs of solid muscle. the girl caught up just fine and now everyone thinks she's older than she is. funny how things change. :)my second daughter only nursed for 7 months- mostly b/c i was ready to let it go at that point the second time around. i was desperate for more sleep at night and i knew once i took that last night feeding away, she'd sleep through it (and she did). she did great with formula for the remaining 5 months (and i bought the organic kind b/c i felt like it was the closest to the "natural" stuff). even though she was over 8 lbs at birth (holy difference from the first!), i did notice that she gained weight faster after i moved her to formula and it's just a natural thing that breastfed babies are probably going to weigh a little less than formula-fed babies b/c they shut themselves off when they nurse, whereas with a bottle, they're more inclined to finish the whole thing. so i'm glad that i made it 7 months of nursing with her.. she was nursed when it was most critical for her to get all that goodness. 🙂 and my goal for the 3rd baby is 6 months… it'll be more of a challenge having two active toddlers around at the same time, but i'm sure as heck gonna try!i have a lot of friends who didn't get the support they needed and gave up quickly on nursing. congrats to you for reaching your goal! it truly is a wonderful thing to do for our children 🙂
Thanks Jen! I didn't know your first had a cord issue– did you ever read my birth story on here? Jackson had his cord wrapped 4 times! It was really scary, only 1 person in the OR had ever seen a baby survive with a nuchal cord x4 before. I know he didn't get much nutrition at the end and that is why he was so small. I was almost 9 pounds and my husband was almost 6 pounds at 4 weeks premature.I'm so glad to hear she caught up, I've actually gotten a lot better at not worrying anymore. He is happy and healthy!I'm so impressed you got 7 months with your second. I've already thought about how much harder it will be to nurse with a toddler running around! 🙂